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How to Find Your Happy

Updated: Nov 12, 2022

I know what you are thinking, who is this girl on the internet to tell me how to find my happiness. It took me several years, articles, researching, stones, meditation, exercise, eating right, cleaning out a closet, you name it I have done in the name of happiness. In the research I did they all said the same thing. All the things that I just listed. Amazing how we have all the worlds information in our hands and still can't find what we are looking for.

I can tell you how I found mine. Hopefully you will get something out of it other than the same ol' same ol'.

I did all these things because I found myself in 2011 as a single mom of 4 daughters, one got diagnosed with a deadly heart/lung disease, one was in diapers, one was starting high school, and I owned a business. There was no happy I didn't even have time to be happy. I was just trying to keep up. How could this all happen at once? Well, it did. And it didn't seem there was a stop to it.

This is how I found my happy.

Tip #1 - What can You Change?

- Make a list of all the things in your life. Your schedule. What can you change? We have a lot we can't but we have some that can.
  • Switch up your schedule. It makes it not so grueling. Clears your mind because you aren't doing it on autopilot.

  • Do you have people that drain you? Change who you are around. It's ok to cut people out of your life and yes that means family. Not all people are good for us.

  • Dinner? We try to eat well especially with kids. A fun dinner isn't going to kill anyone. It makes dinner an event instead of another chore.

  • Can older kids do their laundry? When I had all 4 at home they started doing their laundry at 13. It actually started because my oldest couldn't make it to laundry day. But it took a lot of me!

Tip #2 - Make a list of What Can't Change

We can't change everything. But we can do it differently. Any kind of change is change. These little things turn into big things. You might find things on your list that you think is nonsense and question why it's there. The point.....things you can't change can often be tweaked.

"The true definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result" - Albert Einstein

Tip #3 - Some Things I Changed

I started small. Kids doing their own laundry. We had kid pick a dinner night. At least I didn't have to cook and plan. I stopped obsessing over my daughter's disease. Went from reading something every day to about twice a year. Usually when she had a big Dr appointment. I did start going to the gym and realized I liked it. I'm not a morning eater so I started drinking smoothies. Easier on the stomach and you get your fruit for the day. I started saying NO. This is a big one because I had always been such a people pleaser. Before I feel bad about doing something for myself I ask myself why I feel bad. Make yourself accountable. I quit my job!!!!!

Tip #4 - Accept Your Change

The biggest thing I did to find my happy was, I quit my job. I was miserable. Every day, miserable. I used to love it. There were many reasons to love it and stay with it. But it didn't make me happy anymore. I was an independent personal maid. A fancy way of saying I was an independent housekeeper. I worked on my own at my own schedule. That got me through having 4 kids. I didn't miss anything with them. I loved how physically laborious it was. I only worked 4 hours a day. I had this job for 30 years. The problem is that I went as far as I could with it. It no longer served my purpose. So, I started my boutique. Crazy??? Absolutely!!!!! But it sure made me happy!

Tip #5 - Go Find Your Happy

The truth is that only YOU can find your happy. I can tell you, that after a 3 year search, it should have been easier. It can be. Don't overthink it. One small thing a day. I started with one thing a day to one a week. When I am doing something and I'm not happy I ask myself what I can change about it. I'm obsessed with learning about change now. It's better than dwelling on all the unhappy.

Happy is in All of Us

I always knew I loved to sew. But I had forgotten. Life got in my way. Things tumbled down on me. I just had to get back to a place in my mind that made me remember. Sewing is my happy. Woobies is my happy. Changing my life is my happy. For the first time in a long time I can answer the question. Are you happy? Yes. Are you?

I would love to hear the answer and why.......

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